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    Watch Out For The Elderly

    Today is September 17, 2015.

    Once again, I’m scratching my head, waiting on something to come to me to write this week’s “Valley Echoes”. I guess it comes with age, I say to myself.

    On September 25, 2015 Ginger and I celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary. On October 10, 2015 I turn 70. My youngest child will be 47 this year.

    This really doesn’t bother me, because most of my close friends are older. I’m talking about my golfing partners. In fact, they call me the kid of the group.

    This reminded me of a story I read about the elderly. It goes something like this.
    Granny Clark, a little old lady living in Bradford, Ohio, answered a knock on the door one day, to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
    ‘Good morning, Ma’am,’ said the young man. ‘If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in vacuum cleaners.’
    ‘Go away!’ Granny bellowed. ‘I’m broke and haven’t any money for new fangled contraptions’ and she proceeded to close the door.
    Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. ‘Don’t be too hasty,’ he commanded. ‘Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.’ And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her dining room carpet.
    ‘Now, if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.’
    Granny stepped back and said with a smile, ‘Well let me get you a spoon, young man because DP&L cut off my electriciy this morning.’
    This week’s bottom line: Four Old Men
    Four elderly golfing gentlemen were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about them fifty years from now.
    ‘I would like my grandchildren to say, ‘He was successful in business’ , declared the first man.
    ‘Fifty years from now, ‘said the second, ‘I want them to say, ‘He was a loyal family man’ .
    I want my grandchildren to say, ‘he was always good to their grandmother.”
    Turning to last in the foursome, the first gent asked, ‘So what do you want them to say about you in fifty years?’
    ‘Me?’ the fourth man replied. ‘I want them all to say, ‘He certainly looks good for his age!’
    Stories for this week’s column come from: with a little tweaking.

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